Gossip can be used as a social weapon, especially in a competitive environment like the workplace. When surveyed on the reasons people gossip, the most common reasons stated are: to be viewed as “in the loop”; for entertainment; to gain an advantage over a co-worker; it makes me feel better about me. Gossip, like the news, can be factual. It is your intention that really makes the difference.

Gossip is defined as talking about someone who is not present. Gossip can be positive if it enhances another’s view of the person being discussed. “Did you hear that Bob is going to Florida to visit his brother? He is so excited. They haven’t seen each other for three years!” Gossip can be negative if causes someone harm, pain, confusion or shame. “Did you hear that Bob is going to Florida to visit his brother? He is so excited. They haven’t seen each other for three years. His brother just got out of the slammer!” Both stories may be factual but clearly the second story has great potential to cause Bob harm.

Our society has become desensitized to gossip through our 24 hour news cycle that includes an abundance of talk shows, entertainment news and investigative news shows. Many cover hour upon hour of scandals, sensational stories, crime and political dramas. It is in our nature to share information. Some say it is an evolutionary throw-back to an age when man needed to protect himself from disease, invasion, and tyranny. How we can alter this innate behavior and have a positive influence on the behavior of others?

Building trust in the workplace increases productivity through improved cooperation, an enhanced sense of being part of a team, sharing of skills and best practices, and improved retention. When you have made the commitment to change the culture of gossip in your office you must change your own behavior first. Act as if who you are and what you do matter. It does!

Identify your triggers. Are there places and circumstances that bring out the gossip in you? Can you avoid these triggers or do you need to reset them? If Happy Hour after work is like quick sand for you, can you redirect the conversation to something less toxic such as discussions of books, movies, sports?

When you feel yourself tempted to gossip ask yourself what impact will sharing this information have on me, on the person I am talking about. Can this discussion wait until that person is present to contribute their perspective? Would I feel comfortable having this conversation if the subject of the story were sitting here?

Now, certainly, there are times when you hear news that really bothers you or causes you concern for someone else. In this case it is often helpful to discuss this, get things off your chest, get someone else’s perspective. In this circumstance the best advice is to discuss these issues with someone you know well, whom you trust and WHO WANTS YOU TO BE YOUR BEST SELF. Choose a confidante who will help you work through this issue without spreading the story farther, who will help you sort through the information and to resolve your own feelings.

Your positive resolve to make your workplace a more harmonious and productive environment can be infectious. If you are open about your intention to rid your life of harmful gossip your co-workers and supervisors are sure to appreciate your efforts.